03/02/2020 - Monday - The Positive and the Negative

Another trust building exercise that works for me.

I've found for every positive feeling there is an opposite negative feeling.

The two are tied together by our choices.

One example is fear.

Fear to a certain extent can be good.

It's when that fear becomes overwhelming that it is a completely negative feeling.

In my journey through the wilderness, getting past the overwhelming feeling of fear was the hardest part.

It helps to remember that fear has an opposite right within it's own definition.

As defined by Merriam-Webster:

Definition of fear

 (Entry 1 of 2)

1a: an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger

b(1): an instance of this emotion

(2): a state marked by this emotion

2: anxious concern : SOLICITUDE

3: profound reverence and awe especially toward God

4: reason for alarm : DANGER

fear

 verb

feared; fearing; fears

Definition of fear (Entry 2 of 2)

transitive verb

1: to be afraid of : expect with alarmfear the worst

2: to have a reverential awe offear God

3archaic : FRIGHTEN

4archaic : to feel fear in (oneself)

Did you see that highlighted definition?

To have reverential awe of.

Every time I had to face what I feared, awe of Father was waiting on the other side.

I just had to make the choice to move forward, no matter how overwhelming the fear was at the time.

While I was homeless, I had a friend ask me why I feared him.

I explained that I didn't fear him.

The fear was just in general an overwhelming feeling I had at every turn at that point.

Making the choice to move forward, no matter how much fear I felt, was the right choice.

To answer that question I sense you asking.

Yes, that fear has been replaced by awe.

An awe for Father.  The perfect parent.

The sense of awe just got bigger and more enveloping each time I overcame my fear...stepping out in faith.

Along with that sense of awe comes love, peace and joy in ever increasing amounts.

That's the positive side of fear.

Not fun...but well worth the choice to face my fear.

God wants to be your Father too.

Ask him to show you the truth.

He will.

I love you.  :-)  XOXOXO

02/06/2020 - Thursday - Slippery Slopes

Another lesson being put into practice.

You know that easy path...Someone says or does something that you know is not right. Instead of confronting it you let it slide, you keep letting it slide...it doesn't matter the reason...you just keep letting it slide.

It's a very slippery slope.

I've done that many times.

All it got me was a stress level that left me drowning.

Guess what?

If your a parent, the stress level doubles.

What example do your children follow?

I've found it's primarily their parents.  A combination of both.

They do this without understanding the why of the example.

What happens then?  Well, in my case, the child's stress level can get even higher and sooner.

I can say that from personal experience and from raising a child.

With each generation, the stress level just goes up.

That stress level, for me, was my distance from God.

How do you change that?

For me, the way to change that was to start questioning and changing my choices.

One of those changes was learning that avoiding confrontation, or going down that slippery slope, wasn't the easy path.

It is the hardest road full of potholes and boulders.

Confrontation was, at that time, loud, obnoxious and full of anger.

That is one type of confrontation.  It is ugly!  It makes all the parties involved feel worse about themselves.

Then there is another type of confrontation that I was not at all familiar with until I asked God to show me the truth.

This confrontation is full of love, seeking truth and supports all the parties involved in making positive, life-affirming choices.

The main difference between the two types of confrontation is the feelings and motives that drive them.

I found that once, I gave myself the space to learn from and resolve the negative feelings I had, I could start seeking to understand before speaking.

It's a change that has taken a long time. 

Each time, I've went through the process though, the time taken to get from the ugly to love is shorter.

It doesn't mean the other party or parties are going to agree or work with me.

It means I can speak up for myself, seek forgiveness if I've done wrong and no matter how that other party or parties respond I can love them and know that I have done what I can.

The results…

Instead of stressed, I know faith, hope, love, peace and joy. 

I'm setting a better example for my child and others.

I'm being true to who I am.

God and I get closer and closer.

It's not easy...It's worth the effort to overcome my personal and worldly burdens.

When Christ Jesus said, "For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." (Matthew 11:30), he wasn't kidding.

Ask God...he is the perfect parent and he wants to have a personal relationship with you too.

I love you all.

:-)  XOXOXO

02/01/2020 - Saturday - Learning Self-Discipline as Simple as A,B,C

On Wednesday, 01/29/2020, I posted a status update on Facebook discussing looking for a job.

Yes, for right now I do need to find a job.

One of my dreams is a business called Independable. 

When running any business a certain amount of self-discipline is needed.

When you work for someone else, they determine your start time, your wage, your hours, your responsibilities...in affect, the employer is the disciplinarian...that is if you want to work for them.

Yes, working for someone else requires the self-discipline to follow that employers rules.

That much self-discipline I have.

To run a business and have success, I know you need to have more self-discipline.

An important part of having self-discipline, from what I've learned,  is the ability to set self aside.

Father shows us that through the example of his son, my big brother.

He took care of himself and his business.

Christ Jesus' business was reflecting Father and what Father would do for us if we should choose to follow his, Christ Jesus', example and become a part of something  much bigger than ourselves.

I made that choice.

Since making that choice, I have learned many of the parts that will help me to better reflect  my big brother and my Father.

The one part of self-discipline that is still missing is to be able to pull the pieces together and follow through on them with consistency, day in and day out as Christ Jesus did.

I know the pieces are all there and will fall into place when I learn this last lesson.

That last lesson is how to put a full day together with balance.

Like any skill, you have to build up your knowledge.

I'll give you an example.

I'm going to use my daughter, Kelsey, for this example.

Kelsey gets stuck, frustrated, just doesn't get what she's learning and feels that she should know it when things don't come quickly.

When this happens I have reminded her of skills that took a long time to build.  Like the ability to read.  You don't just open a book and know what all those words are and what they mean.  You learn to speak, you learn the alphabet, then the letter sounds, how to put them together, how to read a word, what the words mean, how the words are spelled, sentence structure, etc…

Then I will explain that these things don't happen overnight...they happen over years, a build up of your skills and continually adding to those skills….school.

To learn any one part it takes repetition to build the thinking and memory to become competent in that portion of the skill to be built.

Hmmm!  This sounds a lot like what I need to remember too.  To give myself a license to learn or a learners permit.

That's where I'm at right now….the pieces of the puzzle are all there...it's just this last piece.

This last piece to be specific, is having a daily plan and following it.

Father has given me a daily plan.

It's the following that's the hard part.

I let myself be distracted, influenced and otherwise led astray.

That is not the fault of others or things...that is immaturity, lack of discernment and not going to Father on my part.

I am starting to gain a mastering of this skill.

In measuring my life span, it's taken almost fourteen years or a long time, to learn the other lessons that build up to gaining the ability to do so.

That has been my time in the wilderness and conquering my worldliness.

It's not been easy.  It's been made easier knowing I have Father to guide me.

That's what makes all that I have been through worth going through.

Father's abundant love, grace and mercy.

For that I am truly grateful and on a daily basis affirm my continued commitment to Father and my journey to completion in him.

I will find the job that Father wants me to have and Independable will grow.

Father will never mislead you or me.  We call all learn, grow and mature in the hands of the perfect parent.  God wants and yearns to have a parent-child relationship with all of us.  It is our choice.

Ask him for yourself.

I love you all.  :-)  XOXOXO